Brought to you by Lung Cancer Group:
There is no rulebook for a cancer diagnosis. You won’t find a dedicated how-to guide on how to deal with a diagnosis, share it with your family, and tell your place of employment that you’re leaving and not coming back. It will be one of the hardest things you ever experienced and will put you on a path that you must navigate entirely blind.
While there is also no right or wrong way to share the news with your employer, you can learn some helpful tips to assist you with the process. Keep the following information in mind as you get ready to schedule a life-changing meeting with your boss:
Decide How Much You Want to Share
Many people feel comfortable sharing everything about their health journey with their employer, including the type of cancer they have, such as lung cancer, how they’re feeling, and lung cancer life expectancy. However, that doesn’t mean you’ll feel the same way. You have complete control over how much you share.
You don’t even have to tell them that you have cancer. Instead, you can say that you’ve received a serious medical diagnosis or have a serious health condition and will be unable to continue working from a specific date. If your employer asks questions or presses for more information, you are not required to provide it while you hand in your notice in person or remotely.
Choose Your Preferred Communication Style
When you’re only just coming to terms with the diagnosis yourself, sharing it with other people can be an overwhelming experience. You may fear becoming distressed or emotional, which is entirely natural. Don’t be afraid to choose a communication style that suits your current emotional state.
You may prefer a brief virtual or in-person meeting and be as open and transparent as possible. Otherwise, you might feel you can articulate your position a little better in a written email or letter. Some people also send an email first before scheduling a meeting. There is no right or wrong way, so decide on the day.
Use a Simple Structure
Whether you’re sharing the news with your employer in person or through email, you can follow a simple structure for your message or conversation to avoid confusion and get your point across succinctly.
- Share the news: Start with the health information you’re willing to share. This might be ‘I’ve recently received a cancer diagnosis’ or something more vague, such as ‘I have a serious health condition.’
- State your position: After breaking the news, state your position on it. In this situation, you’ve decided to leave your role so you can focus on your health and treatment, if applicable.
- Provide your timeline: Your employer needs to know when you’re leaving so they can make plans to hire and train someone new. Provide a clear last working day.
- Express appreciation: This step is optional, but if you genuinely are appreciative of the time you’ve worked for your employer, this is the time to say so.
- Discuss the transition: Many employees offer to assist with transferring their responsibilities to other employees or to new employees. If you’re willing and able to do this, inform your employee that you can and for how long.
Prepare for Their Reaction
It can be hard to know what to say when someone tells you they’re unwell. As comfortable as your employer might be with you, there’s a chance they may respond with empathy tinged with awkwardness, simply because they aren’t sure what to say.
If you’re worried about such responses, keep short and straightforward answers in mind, such as ‘Thank you, I appreciate it.’ Furthermore, just like in a job interview, if your employer asks you a question you’re not comfortable answering, you don’t have to answer.
Seek Support
When you genuinely love your job and the people you work with, resigning from your position undoubtedly takes a huge emotional toll. Don’t be afraid to seek support before, during, or after you share the news.
You can take a support person to a meeting with your employer to share the news, if that’s what you need. You may even share your news with a trusted friend or colleague before your meeting, so the burden isn’t so heavy to carry.
Take Care of Yourself
After what is likely an extremely hard announcement to make, it’s time to take care of yourself. If possible, take the rest of the day off or have an extended lunch so you can process what happened. Don’t underestimate the benefits of walking, journaling, mindfulness, and breathing exercises when your feelings have gotten the better of you. Your coworkers will understand and support you as best as they can.
There is no right or wrong way to resign, just the way that’s right for you. Choose your preferred communication style and only share as much as you feel comfortable sharing. Most importantly, ensure you take care of yourself and have all the support you need during this challenging time.
